Aging

I am 30. This week I seem to have been struggling with that. When my 30th birthday came and went I was okay with it. Another year older. Another year wiser. Right? Then slowly 30 has been creeping up on me. A few gray hairs here and there. A gigantic grey eyebrow hair (which I wasted no time and plucked that sucker right out of there!). When I look in the mirror at myself things just don't look the same anymore. Sigh. This whole growing my hair process isn't helping things either. In the last few weeks I've felt like age has just been creeping up on me and not in a good way. The other day my mother made my day! She called to see if I wanted to have lunch. I told her that I didn't feel social and that I just wanted to sit and read my book. She wasn't letting up so I finally agreed to lunch but warned her that I wasn't good company. My mother showed up with a bouquet of flowers and a book for me. Ironically the book was titled, "The Opposite of Me." We talked about aging and the changes that go along with it. How our bodies are no longer the bodies of a 20 year old. How one day you look in the mirror and think to yourself, "Who are you?" By the time lunch was over my mother had made me feel a lot better. She told me that at age 30 how my life is a lot different than her's was when she was 30. She also told me about a song she'd once heard. She said, "If you knew the exact day you'd die how would you live your life differently? Would you be fretting about being 30 and how things are changing?" The answer was no. If I knew the exact day that I would die I would not be sitting here feeling down on myself about getting older. Which got me thinking about an earlier conversation I had with Larry on the phone when he asked if I wanted to go to the Twins game with him and Mylan that night. I automatically said no. The first thoughts to my head were, "More baseball? I still have dishes to wash, floors to vacuum, laundry to do, to shower, to eat dinner, to clean the car windows, trash to take out...." These are the things that constantly rattle in my head. Welcome to my brain. So after my conversation with my mother I thought, "I should go to the game with them even though more baseball is the last thing I want to do. If Larry isn't worried that the house isn't in prefect order (our house never is) then why should I?" So I went to the game and we had fun!

So while I am still going to have some adjustments to learning this new curve ball, called age, that life is throwing at me I plan to beat it at it's own game...or at least try. I am not one who likes change. I like to plan and know what is coming before it ever arrives. However, that just isn't the way life is. So I guess I'll just have to embrace it as best I can.